I am so excited that President Obama was awarded the Nobel Peace Prize. "GASP! OH THE HORROR! I thought she was a Christian??? Didn't Jesus tell all Christians to hate Obama before he ascended to Heaven on the third day?"
Well, if you must know the reason behind my puzzling excitement, it is for no other reason than now I, Jennifer Porter (once Robinson and once Porter-Robinson, but now just back to Porter), have a shot a being a Nobel Peace Prize Winner. I believe Obama and I are comparable to our contributions to World Peace and actually have a lot more in common that I thought (see below).
Is there like a drawing you can put your name in? Or a Survey on Why you think you deserve the prize? Well, if there was...below is my David Letterman Style, "Top Seven Reasons Why Jennifer Porter Deserves a Nobel Peace Prize". So what that I'm not great enough to have a top ten....obviously you don't have to be THAT great..
7.)In traffic during the morning commute, I didn't jump out of my car and punch the idiot in front of me for cutting me off.
6.) I too,allow the Olympics to distract me from more important issues. There's nothing more fascinating that black men beating the white guys in every event expect Gymnastics and Swimming.
5.) Obama may have street "cred" and the ability relate to all but so do I. I'm like a mullet-business in the front; party in the back.
4.)I would say off-the record (or on for that matter) that Kanye West is a idiot.
3.) I may not show it, but deep down...I'm a narcissist.
2.) My dog is from a puppy mill but it's justified because it was a gift.
1.) Sure I'll save the environment as long as the recycle bin is no further from the trash can....it's all about convenience. And if I had my own plane, I would totally use a years work of gas for a night at the theater (drill baby, drill!)
I'm not too sure how I contributed to World Peace from our similarities above except that I, too stand by my moral belief in saving the lives of the innocent. defending the weak and honoring our brave....oh, wait that's not something Obama and I have in common.