Why did I stop blogging in the first place, you may ask? Or you may be asking, why in the heck (I'm a mommy now....my language has improved bitches) would you think we even knew you were gone? Regardless, I do have a few valid reasons to my sudden departure of blogging.
1.) I now have a black line running through my blog post. If you know how to fix it, let me know. Otherwise, I am too lazy to figure out how to fix it and too cheap to buy a new layout. If you have missed me dearly and create layouts, I suggest you fix mine for FREE. I'm a baller on a budget. Tory Burch shoes don't grow on trees, ya know?
2.) I got pregnant, fat and lazy.
3.) I had a baby and became hormonally imbalanced and certifiably crazy. Unless you wanted to hear about the troll who lived in my fireplace, it probably wasn't a good idea to document what was going on behind my blood shot and sleep deprived eyes.
4.) I like to sleep in my free time.
5.) I quit working and no longer spend my spare time behind a desk making $29.50 an hour. Yes, my old employer would pay me to blog. Take that sucker!
6.) I lost all social skills (including savvy yet witty writing) due to spending all day alone with a baby.
7.) I usually have baby poo under my fingernails. It's just not hygienic to type with crap on your hands.
So once again, I'm not use to this whole blogging thing. I'm out of practice, ya know? So I'll just stop my top 10 list at 7. That's good enough, right???